Self-Awareness

Forever Friends: Leaving a Legacy of Learning and Love

I'm Mary!

The Presence Path is about finding self compassion and walking your way home to yourself.  Living in your joy, creating and being true to your authentic self expression - is the key to create the fulfilling life you dream of.  Thank you for being here. I'm happy to share the journey with you.

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Friends Sylvia Patzlaff (left), Chris Clarke Epstein (middle) and me bed-dancing (instigated by Chris) at my first NSA Convention, 1987

One of my forever friends, mentor, colleague, instigator of all things creative and empowering, Chris Clarke-Epstein passed away on Friday from metastatic breast cancer. Whew. You think you can handle it and you should hold it together because that’s what she would do and want for you, and yet my walks are plodding and my heart hurts—for her, her family, for all of us who knew her and those who never will.

I know I’m writing a memoir here in this post and Chris would edit me for brevity but some moments, some lives, give and teach you so much, you ask for a one-time papal dispensation on word count.

Last Wish

I also know so many, many people are feeling as deeply as I am. Her leadership, reach, and impact on members of the National Speakers Association (NSA) and her local Wausau community are legendary. Our shared friends on Facebook number 319 and many have written such beautiful tributes and memories to Chris and I have loved reading all of them. If you didn’t know her, I hope you have a Chris in your life, and if you don’t, make it a priority to find one. And vote. Early if you can. One of Chris’s last wishes.

Along with the feelings of sadness, I’m equally grateful for all the life I was lucky to share with her and her family over the years, especially during the early growth of my speaking career and our leadership in NSA that gave me a life I never could have dreamed up on my own.

Big Sisters, Best Advice, Hardest Truths

Chris and I met at our local Wisconsin chapter back in the 1980’s. Wow, we were young and so excited to share our motivational messages and learn the speaking business. Similar to many of you, along the way Chris and I became close friends. She was the big sister I had always hoped for. She always had the best advice and sometimes the hardest truths, spoken with care and always with the intent to help me be a better me.

Chris celebrated me, encouraged me, made me laugh (including dancing on hotel room beds when we were conference roommates), lighten up, and step up, and cheered me on as we moved through NSA Chapter Leadership and into National leadership. She’s the one who whispered in my ear at a Wisconsin chapter meeting for board nominations, “Put your hand up. You’re ready. You can do this.” Two chapter presidencies followed.

“Yes, your decision is difficult for many reasons. So try this on: What is it that you most want and need? Decide for that and decide on a reasonable time to re-evaluate, let’s say, six months. And in between then, live that decision with your whole heart, no wavering or looking back, only forward until that future day arrives. Only then, evaluate and ask yourself, “Am I better off now than I was back then?” Likely you’ll be better off, but if not, you go back to the other choice or make a new one.”

Chris’s values, her belief in herself, and in me gave me the confidence to follow my heart and move to San Diego. Twenty-eight years later, it’s turned out to be one of the best decisions of my life.

A few months after moving to San Diego, 1992.
There is nothing like Big Talk on the beach with a best friend!

“Of course we’re here. Where else would we want to be but here!”
-Chris Clarke Epstein

My Mother, My Friend

After my mom died and while I was writing my book, “My Mother, My Friend,” Chris shared her stories and her mom JunieB with me. When the book came out, my first stop on the book tour was hometown Milwaukee at a Barnes & Noble where the most intimidating audience of family, high school and college teachers, and friends who had never seen me speak were coming. Chris and June drove four hours from Wausau and surprised me just before I was ready to go on with the biggest hugs and “You can do this.”

Chris, her mom JunieB, and me at my book signing, 2001

Happy Moments, Memories and Photos

As the years went on and our paths went in different directions, we didn’t connect as often but every phone call was as if no time had passed. Two summers ago I took her writing class and as always, her insights and edits made everything better. When her mom passed last January, Chris wrote on Facebook that she went through photos to remember her mom from her favorite memories and suggested that we not only do the same but that we remember to take the photos in those happy moments. I’m so glad I did. Over the past few days as I’ve been going through my photos, thinking about Chris, her fierce love, messages of lifelong learning, showing up, and embracing change, the words from an old Flavia card kept wandering into my mind. I finally looked it up. For those of you who knew Chris, I think you’ll agree that she was all of this and more…

“Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some people move our souls to dance. They awaken us to a new understanding with the passing whisper of their wisdom. Some people make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon. They stay in our lives for a while, leave footprints on our hearts, and we are never, ever the same.”

– Flavia
Mentors matter. These three women leaders (top/Leslie Charles, center/Chris Clarke-Epstein, right/Marilynn Semonick) mentored me through my speaking career.

Who is a Chris in your life? Do they know? I encourage you to write them an email or handwrite and send a letter, or better if you can, go visit them. Tell them what you’ve learned from them while you still have time. Chris would love that.

PS. And remember to vote. And vote early.

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My intention as a trained Mindful Self-Compassion teacher and coach is to help you reconnect to your wise, loving, intuitive self, follow your creative calling, and experience and share your creative gifts with the world. 

I bring 30 years of experience as an international inspirational speaker specializing in communications and stress management and over a decade in Marketing Consultancy. I am the author of "My Mother, My Friend," and "Living with Enthusiasm" and a contributing author to five best-selling "Chicken Soup for the Soul" books and "A Woman's Way to Success in Business." I have been featured in numerous national publications and broadcasts and have spoken on more than 1500 stages around the world. 

I believe there is a path to create the life you want and achieve your goals and dreams - at any age, at any stage. It is my honor and joy to help women find their creative calling and put their dreams at the forefront of their lives.


My intention as a trained Mindful Self-Compassion teacher and coach is to help you reconnect to your wise, loving, intuitive self, follow your creative calling, and experience and share your creative gifts with the world. 

I bring 30 years of experience as an international inspirational speaker specializing in communications and stress management and over a decade in Marketing Consultancy. I am the author of "My Mother, My Friend," and "Living with Enthusiasm" and a contributing author to five best-selling "Chicken Soup for the Soul" books and "A Woman's Way to Success in Business."

I have been featured in numerous national publications and broadcasts and have spoken on more than 1500 stages around the world, sharing how to stay inspired, enthusiastic, and healthy in changing times.

I believe there is a path to create the life you want and achieve your goals and dreams - at any age, at any stage. It is my honor and joy to help women find their creative calling and put their dreams at the forefront of their lives.


I would love to help you bring your creative spirit to life.

Learn more

A Lifetime of Experience, Travels, Challenge & Change

Mary is Director of Communications for the Center for Mindful Self Compassion and is a MSC Trained Teacher, Coach, Meditation Guide and Retreat Leader based in San Diego, California. You can find Mary creating artful photography and leading walking meditation groups on the beaches of Torrey Pines Reserve.

Mary's career experience includes over a decade working as a marketing consultant with business, government, nonprofit, and community organizations to create and complete mission-driven collaborative projects and events, and a 30-year career traveling internationally as a communication and stress management speaker and author. 

Working with latest research on stress, positive psychology, and brain/mindset learning into practical and powerful lifestyle strategies, Mary inspires people to make conscious choices and take inspired action in the midst of challenge and change, believing that all dreams are possible.

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written by mary marcdante

written by
mary marcdante

Living with Enthusiasm

Living with Enthusiasm is a powerful 21-Day Plan for turning your stress into success, funk into fun, and adversity into adventure. It's about going for the gusto.

WRITTEN BY MARY MARCDANTE

WRITTEN BY
MARY MARCDANTE

My Mother, My Friend

Every woman has things that she wants to talk about with her mother -- but can't. Big questions about health, aging and money, and even more personal issues about family secrets and Mom's relationship with Dad have made for extremely difficult conversations -- until now.

purchase the book  →

purchase the book  →