My Mother, My Friend
THE TEN MOST IMPORTANT THINGS 
TO TALK ABOUT WITH YOUR MOTHER

RESOURCES 
Scroll down this list for research, books, magazines, movies, music, TV shows, and websites that expand each of the ten conversations. Click on the topic you're interested in and it will take you right to the information. If you would like to add other material to this site, email me at mary@marymarcdante.com.

And, please, I'd love to hear from you. Share your stories and questions and I'll post them on the website.  

If you're wondering about the song titles for chapters titles, I found that as I wrote, these songs kept dancing about in my mind. All of them are songs I grew up with or that remind me of my relationship with my Mom. Her all-time favorite? "Moon River." Enjoy.  ~~ Mary


Introduction          Getting To Know You --  How to Begin


Conversation 1     I am Woman  -- Health and Sexuality


Conversation 2     Pennies from Heaven -- Money


Conversation 3     You Are So Beautiful -- Self Image & Beauty


Conversation 4     Some Enchanted Evening -- Romantic Intimacy & Men


Conversation 5     When You Walk Through a Storm -- Resolving Conflict


Conversation 6     Do You Want To Know A Secret? -- Family Secrets


Conversation 7     Show Me The Way To Go Home -- Aging


Conversation 8     Amazing Grace -- Spirituality


Conversation 9     The Rose -- Death & Dying


Conversation 10   Wind Beneath My Wings – Appreciation



Introduction
Getting to Know You (Julie Andrews)
How to Begin
Books
  • Chicken Soup for the Mother’s Soul by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Marcy Shimoff, Jennifer Hawthorne. Health Communications, 1997

  • Stop Screaming at the Microwave: How to Connect Your Disconnected Life by Mary LoVerde, Fireside, 1998

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Conversation 1
I am Woman (Helen Reddy)
Health & Sexuality

Research

  • p. 37  Working Women's Healthcare Costs
    Survey done by Milliman & Robertson Inc., an actuarial company that sells guidelines to health insurance companies Copyright 1997, The New Republic Susan E. Reed, Is managed care unfair to women?: MISS TREATMENT. , The New Republic, 12-29-1997.
  • p. 45  World Health Organization Study
    “The Age of Anxiety.” Ann Elliott Cutting. Newsweek Special Issue – Health for Life, Spring/Summer 1999
  • p. 46  Depressive Symptoms
     FAQ website of the North American Menopause Society http://www.menopause.org
  • P.47  Depression and Heart Attacks
    Laura Beil / Public Health Writer of the Dallas Morning News, Depression may be major heart risk factor: Massive study ranks it near smoking, high cholesterol. The Dallas Morning News, 11-17-1997, pp 6D.
  • p. 54  Be Part of a Loving Community
    Love & Survival. Dr. Dean Ornish. HarperCollins 1998. Chapter 2, pp. 43, 53

Books

  • Dr. Nancy Snyderman's Guide to Good Health, Dr. Nancy Snyderman

  • The Silent Epidemic: The Truth About Women and Heart Disease, call the American Heart Association at 800-AHA-USA1
    http://www.americanheart.org.

  • The Silent Passage, Gail Sheehy. Pocket Books, 1998.
    Excellent resource with helpful examples and research.

  • Strong Women Stay Young; Strong Women Stay Slim, Dr. Miriam Nelson – practical strength-building program that all women can benefit from.

  • Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom, Dr. Christiane Northrup – absolutely the most thorough book on women’s health on the market. A health bible.

Magazines/Newsletters

  • American Health

  •  Natural Health

  • Health

  • Women’s Health Wisdom Newsletter, Dr. Christiane Northrup – a monthly newsletter with the latest medical developments in women’s health.

Websites

Wellness Web Women’s Health Center

Organizations

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Conversation 2
     Pennies from Heaven (Frank Sinatra)
     Money

Books

  • Nine Steps to Financial Freedom by Suze Orman

  • The Courage to Be Rich by Suze Orman

  • Prince Charming Isn’t Coming Anymore: How Women Get Smart About Money by Barbara Stanny

  • The Energy of Money: A Spiritual Guide to Financial and Personal Fulfillment by Maria Nemeth

  • Money Doesn’t Grow On Trees: A Parent’s Guide to Raising Financially Responsible Children by Neale S. Godfrey

Magazines

  • Modern Maturity
  • Working Woman Magazine

Websites     All of these sites are worth a bookmark!

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Conversation 3
You are So Beautiful (Joe Cocker)
Self-Image and Beauty
Books
  • The Beauty Myth, Naomi Wolf

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Conversation 4 -
 
Some Enchanted Evening (Barbara Streisand)
Romantic Intimacy & Men

Books

  • Chicken Soup for the Couples’ Soul: Stories about Love & Relationships by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Barbara De Angelis, and Mark and Chrissy Donnelly. Health Communications, 1999.

  • The Dance of Intimacy: A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships by Harriet Lerner. HarperCollins, 1990. Anything by Harriet Lerner is Gold! 

  • Journey of the Heart: Intimate Relationship and the Path of Love by John Welwood. Harper Perennial, 1990.

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Conversation 5 

When You Walk Through a Storm (Elvis Presley)
Resolving Conflict

Books

  • Anger: The Misunderstood Emotion by Carol Tavris. Touchstone, 1989

  • The Dance of Anger: A Woman’s Guide to Changing The Patterns of Intimate Relationship by Harriet Lerner. Harper Perennial, 1989.

  • Tongue Fu!: How to Deflect, Disarm, and Defuse Any Very Conflict by Sam Horn. St. Martin’s 1996.

  • Why is Everyone So Cranky?: The Ten Trends That Are Making Us Angry and How We Can Find Peace of Mind Instead by C. Leslie Charles. Hyperion, 1999.

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Conversation 6 
Do You Want To Know A Secret? (The Beatles)
Family Secrets

Books

  • The Dance of Deception: A Guide to Authenticity & Truth-Telling in Women's Relationships by Harriet Lerner. HarperCollins, 1994. Illuminating and skill-building. My favorite of her books.

Support Services…

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Conversation 7 
Show Me The Way To Go Home 
(Mitch Miller)
Aging

Books

  • Celebrating Ourselves, A Crone Ritual Book by Edna Ward, editor.

  • The Fountain of Age by Betty Friedan. Simon & Schuster, 1993

  • Modern Maturity Magazine  

  • Necessary Losses: The Loves, Illusions, Dependencies and Impossible Expectations that All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Grow Up by Judith Viorst. Fawcett Books, 1993.

  • On Women Turning 60: Embracing the Age of Fulfillment by Kathleen Rountree. Harmony Books, 1997

  • On Women Turning 70: Honoring the Voices of Wisdom by Kathleen Rountree. Jossey-Bass, 1999. Both On Women… books are part of an inspiring series that include interviews and essays.

Music

  • Ancient Mother by On Wings of song & Robert Gass. Spring Hill Music, 1993.

  • Fire Within by Libana. Ladyslipper, Inc. 1990.

  • The Music of Hildegard von Bingen. Angel Records, 1994.

Support Services
  • American Association of Retired Persons (AARP)   (800)-424-3410
    601 E. Street NW
    Washington, DC

  • Children of Aging Parents in Levittown, Pa.: 1-800-227-7294
    pamphlets available: ``Families Planning Ahead Checklist.”

  • Eldercare Locator
    Explore housing option for your elderly parents
    Provides referrals to local agencies that provide senior services.
    Administered by the U.S. Administration on Aging
    1-800-677-1116

  • National Council on Aging
    Very thorough site with many helpful links to other aging websites.

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Conversation 8
Amazing Grace (Judy Collins)
Spirituality

Books

  • The Bible, Torah, the Book of Mormon, Upanishads, or whatever testimony honors your religion or spiritual beliefs.

  • Gifts from the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh. Vintage Books, 1955, 1978.

  • Intuition Workout by Nancy Rosanoff. Aslan Publishing, 1991.

  • Personal Power Through Awareness by Sanaya Roman. HJ Kramer, 1991.

  • Tender Mercies by Annie LaMott. Pantheon Books, 1999.

  • That’s Funny. You Don’t Look Buddhist: On Being a Faithful Jew and Passionate Buddhist by Sylvia Boorstein. Harper San Francisco, 1997.

  • Peace Pilgrim: Her Life and Work in Her Own Words by Friends of Peace Pilgrim. Ocean Tree Books, 1982.

  • The Prospering Power of Love by Catherine Ponder. DeVorss & Co., 1966.

Magazines

  • Clarity: A Guideposts Publication for Women.
    39 Seminary Hill Road, Carmel, NY 10512.

  • Intuition Magazine  
    (415) 538-8171 

  • Body & Soul Magazine
    (740) 375-2332
    PO Box 1949, 
    Marion OH, 43305-1949

Music

  • Ancient Mother by On Wings of Song & Robert Gass.

  • The Heritage Collection by Lori Lines.

  • Path by Wyndham Hill Artists.

  • Vision: The Music of Hildegard Von Bingen.

Videos/Movies/TV

  • The Oprah Winfrey Show

  • Beloved

  • Phenomenon

  • Resurrection (with Ellen Burstyn)

  • Sister Act I & II

  • Song of Bernadette

Retreats

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Conversation 9
The Rose (Bette Midler)
Death & Dying

Books

  • Losing a Parent: Passage to a New Way of Living by Alexandra Kennedy.

  • Motherless Daughters by Hope Edelman

  • The Wheel of Life: A Memoir of Living and Dying by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross and Todd Gold.

  • How to Survive the Loss of a Love by Melba Colgrove, Ph.D., Harold H. Bloomfield, M.D., and Peter McWilliams.

  • The Courage to Laugh: Humor, Hope, and Healing in the Face of Death and Dying by Allen Klein.

Music

  • Classical music by Mozart, Bach, Beethoven, Saint Saens

  • Sand & Water by Beth Chapman      Absolutely BEAUTIFUL lyrics and melody. Don't miss this one.

  • Spectrum Suite by Stephen Halpern

  • Bereavement music by Paul Alexander   
    800-538-4138

Websites

  • www.AlexandraKennedy.com        
    Very helpful website that highlights workshops, articles, and books by a leading grief therapist.

  • http://www.growthhouse.org/      
    An extensive website that offers grief support, information, newsletters, legal help, and articles on death and dying

  • www.hospice-cares.com        
    An online community that offers hospice-related information available on the Internet, along with articles and comprehensive book reviews.

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Conversation 10
Wind Beneath My Wings (Bette Midler)
Appreciation

Books

  • Chicken Soup for the Mother's Soul : 101 Stories to Open the Hearts and Rekindle the Spirits of Mothers
    by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Marci Shimoff, Jennifer Hawthorne     Story  included by Mary Marcdante -- "Squeeze My Hand and I'll Tell You That I Love You."

  • Chicken Soup for the Mother's Soul 2 : 101 More Stories to Open the Hearts and Rekindle the Spirits of Mothers
    by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen, Marci Shimoff, Carol Kline     Story by Mary Marcdante included -- "I'm Right Here with You Honey."

  • Touching Tomorrow : How to Interview Your Loved Ones to Capture a Lifetime of Memories on Video or Audio by Mary Lo Verde

Websites

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